As we embark on yet another new year, I want to encourage you to resolve to be more empowered, grateful, positive. Use the new year as a prompt to renew. I think we should all at any random moment take time out for gratitude and renewal. Let’s celebrate the things we love, the people we love and let’s include ourselves in that!
We always think that New Year is a time for resolutions. And maybe that change of year is a symbolic time to change something. But maybe it’s also the perfect time for renewal, rebirth, reflection. Resets.
When we talk New Years Resolutions, we usually mean introspection, berating ourselves, pointing out something we don’t like about ourselves and then resolving to stop it or change it. We look at things we are dissatisfied with and set goals to improve them.
Often we start the year by telling ourselves we are unhappy or dissatisfied and then (even more often) set ourselves up to fail. More dissatisfaction and self-loathing. We may be telling ourselves we’re too fat and announcing that we will lose 3 stone with immediate effect. Or that we’ll join a gym and get toned, only to not use the membership. We’ll announce our intention to give up smoking/drinking/eating fast food. We begin our year with recrimination, revolt for ourselves.
Gratitude and Renewal
I advocate for something more positive.
Let’s make resolutions that are empowering, accepting and full of gratitude. Let’s reflect, renew, re-evaluate but in a positive way, from a place of love and gratitude.
What better way than do do this than think about what and who we are grateful for. As a celebrant, my absolute favourite celebration is a Vow Renewal. Or, as you do not have to be married to have one, a Gratitude Ceremony.
John and I have been together 30 years. We’re not married. But we’ve still periodically stopped and made promises, reflected on our life and looked forward to the next chapter. One year, on a random date, we just decided to book a celebrant and along with our grown children and their partners, celebrate under the stars. I’ll share it in another post.
WHAT is a Vow Renewal Ceremony?
- A Vow Renewal Service is basically a celebration of love and gratitude.
- It is an opportunity to reflect on the journey you have taken together to date
- It is an chance to tell each other how grateful you are for them
- At a ceremony you can make promises to each other for the future
- You can look back on everything you have been through together and how much easier it was because of the other.
- You can vocalise your shared dreams.
- Or give thanks for the others strength, love, insightfulness
- You can big each other up and point out the qualities that make them magnificent in your eyes, heart and mind.
- It is an opportunity to acknowledge how, together, you are greater than the sum of your individual parts.
Who is a Vow Renewal or Gratitude Ceremony For?
- Anyone. Couples, throuples, friends, communities.
- You do not need to be married or in a civil partnership
- You may just want to gives thanks
- you may want to reflect on a chapter closing
- Or (and) commit to a common goal for the future
- If you have been helped through a trauma or survived something together, you may want to give thanks
- If you have been married for a while it might be the chance to re visit your vows, or make new ones
- this is your chance to show your children, what your love is about
How and Where can I have a Renewal or Gratitude Ceremony?
- You can literally do it anywhere!
- You can honestly do it however you want
- Include whoever you want
- There really are no rules
Some Ideas
- at night , under the stars
- at the location of your first date
- where you got married
- at your favourite pub or restaurant
- just the two of you
- completely the opposite of the wedding!
- involve your grown up kids or a couple of best friends
- pack a picnic
- book a couples shoot and a celebrant
Basically
- pick a favourite place indoors or outdoors
- choose how structured you want it to be
- set your budget
- decide who you want involved
- do it
Make 2025 your year to REFLECT, RENEW.
Here are three real stories of services I’ve had the joy of creating for real couples
